One day at a time

One day at a time

The response to the announcement that Melanie has cancer has been overwhelming, not just in the comments here, but in personal emails and on Melanie’s blog. Thank you all so much. Every single one of your emails and comments have done much to help.

We’re in good spirits right now. We laugh and joke and talk about the normal things of life. The ugly shadow sits in the corner, never far from our minds, but we don’t let it take over, except perhaps in those dark stretches of the night, laying awake in bed.

There’s still so much we don’t know. I went to the American Cancer Society’s web site to do some research and I’m not even sure which kind of uterine cancer to look up. I have some idea based on what the doctor said, but I won’t know for sure until Monday. I did get a list of questions you should ask your doctor, although there are some questions that aren’t in there, the sort of thing that’s so mundane that they don’t bother to address it.

I won’t lie to you. When they start listing survival rates and percentages, my heart stops and fear grips me. Yes, it’s just a number and the reality is that life has a 100% mortality rate and that’s there no guarantee I won’t be gone tomorrow. And, Yes, I know that every individual is different, with different treatments and a different way that cancer affects her. But to see a number on a page hits too close to home.

On Friday we made a special effort to get to the noon Mass at our parish. We always mean to get to daily Mass during Lent, but there’s always something that gives an excuse, usually to do with the baby. But Friday we went. Ironically, it was the feast of St. Frances of Rome, which is a nice coincidence (God-incidence?) because we had named our miscarried baby Francis/Frances. After Mass, we asked Fr. Murphy to grant Melanie the Sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick, which he did in the chapel, right in front of the Blessed Sacrament, while she was holding Isabella and I was right next to her. How every word of the prayers and blessings struck home with greater force than ever.

So now we wait until Monday… sometime. Trying not to dwell on it, but unable to completely avoid it.

Blessed Teresa of Calcutta, please pray for Melanie that she may be miraculously healed of all cancer, that she may be made whole and entire, that she may continue to co-create with God His children for immortal life. May this miraculous healing be a sign of God’s favor to you and be the sign for you to raised the final step to altars as a saint in His Church.

[From the web site linked above:] Blessed Teresa of Calcutta, longing to love Jesus as He had never been loved before, you gave yourself entirely to Him, refusing Him nothing. In union with the Immaculate Heart of Mary, you accepted His call to satiate His infinite thirst for love and souls and become a carrier of His love to the poorest of the poor.

With loving trust and total surrender you fulfilled His will, witnessing to the joy of belonging totally to Him. You became so intimately united to Jesus your crucified Spouse that He deigned to share with you the agony of His Heart as He hung upon the Cross.

Blessed Teresa, you promised to continuously bring the light of love to those on earth; pray for us that we also may long to satiate the burning thirst of Jesus by loving Him ardently, sharing in His sufferings joyfully, and serving Him wholeheartedly in our brothers and sisters, especially those most unloved and unwanted. Amen.

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  • I have been thinking of you both all day today.  The waiting must be so difficult.  We live in a wonderful age of communication, but sometimes there is too much of a good thing.  Be careful of how much research you do—it’s good to be informed, but sometimes we can freak ourselves out.  I speak from experience.  I will especially remember you at Mass tomorrow.

  • Dear Dom and Melanie
    DO NOT read the statistics (and trust me on this because I am a statistician). My brother was diagnosed with unknown primary 1 year and 4 months ago and I was so angery when the doctors rattled of the statistics to him (4 6 months). He is still alive and eats well, exercises and keeps busy with all his hobbies. The doctor’s did not factor in his attitude and his desire to live. He has become my hero and I want you to know that The beginning, finding out, is like a punch in the gur, but you will become stronger as time goes on.Melanie is in my prayers along with the rest of your family. God Bless you.

  • My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer just over two years ago.  I remember the sick feeling when she told me about it.  It was scary, even though it was diagnosed in the early stages and the doctors gave her a good prognosis from the beginning.  She had to go through a double mastectomy and chemotherapy, on top of that my brother (her youngest son) was in Iraq.  Thank God my mom recovered, and my brother came home safely.  I was not at ease until my mom’s treatment was over and my brother was on the ground at Ft. Hood.  You are in my prayers still.

    St. Peregrine, Pray for us!
    Blessed Teresa of Calcutta, Pray for us!

  • So happy to hear of the positive note above.

    I offerred up Mass yesterday for you guys and plead for the intercession of Blessed Mother Teresa.